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"You can't say that because it offends me"
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Post by
Laihendi
The double standard here is that you are technically doing everything you're complaining about other people doing in this scenario. If someone and I have a conversation, and I tell them I am offended, you are getting involved in something that isn't any of your business by caring what goes on between us, by the same definition that you think I am. If you think you can tell everyone NOT to expect certain things to be not said around them, then you are also making decisions about how the rest of society needs to behave. So I'll ask you to answer your own question- why are you getting involved in something that's none of your business, and who are you to decided how the rest of society should behave?
The purpose of this thread is to exchange ideas with others. That is what Laihendi (and everyone else here) is doing. Laihendi is not saying that you
should
act a certain way or
should not
act a certain way. He is also not expecting you to change your values to conform to his own and act in a way that Laihendi finds suitable. Laihendi is merely pointing out where he disagrees with your decisions and values, and you are of course free to disregard his input.
Laihendi lives according to his own values. Though he does not expect others to live according to them, he is willing to explain his values to others.
Post by
ElhonnaDS
Fair enough.
Well then the rest of my post still stands. I think that on an individual level, we have a responsibility to promote the values we think or correct, and argue against things we think are immoral. I think that if you feel that one person's actions and words are harmful to others, then you have as much right to try and protect other people as you do to protect yourself.
Post by
134377
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Magician22773
One of the funniest...and most awkward...situations I have ever been in was when I picked up a client for an old company that I worked for at the airport. I can't remember if he was from England or Australia (somewhere with a heavy accent)....
Anyways, I had known this guy all of about 15 minutes, and as soon as we walked out of the airport, his exact words were "Hey, where can I find some f@gs at around here?" As you can imagine....I was left completely speechless.....Until I realized that where he was from, a f@g was a slang term for a cigarette.
So yes, one does have to take into consideration where a person comes from when determining just how offensive something they say is.
PS......sorry to circumvent the filter, but I hope it is OK for this thread...if not, please mod it if necessary......
Post by
134377
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
134377
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Nathanyal
Aww but I liked it :(
Post by
MyTie
Sausage balls? Those sound pretty good. I could go for a few &*!gots right now.
Post by
asakawa
There's lots of offal involved (heart and liver) and they're wrapped in fatty stomach lining called "caul". If I'm eating that sort of thing I'll take haggis any day - much nicer (and haggis has more lungs in it O.o).
Post by
Magician22773
There's lots of offal involved (heart and liver) and they're wrapped in fatty stomach lining called "caul". If I'm eating that sort of thing I'll take haggis any day - much nicer (and haggis has more lungs in it O.o).
Can I officially say that &*!gots are gross now?
Post by
MyTie
Sounds like it would go with mustard pretty well... What would you use as a base? Sandwich bread with mustard and kraut?
Post by
Magician22773
I have eaten some pretty wierd stuff before, and to be honest, most of it was downright disgusting. I have tried several different types of insects and various animal organs, and I can't think of anythng, with the exception of beef heart, that was even remotely tasty.
Now, I do have to say that I am a huge fan of sausages, and I also have a pretty good idea of what goes into making some of those, but for the most part, I have found that most all other "delicasies" are just gross.
I can say that deep fried tarantula wasn't bad, but then again, you can deep fry an old shoe in a good batter and it would taste good I think.
Post by
134377
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Nathanyal
I've never understood why eating a slice of a pig's back or bum is generally considered nice, but eating it's head or pluck is considered disgusting. Close your eyes. Does it taste nice?
When you say bum do you mean pork butt? Because that actually comes from the shoulder of the pig, not the rear.
As for the head, some people do roast a whole pig and eat it. I have heard that the cheeks do taste good. You can also eat the ears, but I don't know of many people that do.
Some places also use the pluck, never heard that before so I had to look it up. For those that don't know the pluck is just the lungs, kidneys and heart of the pig. And I know that lots of places cook with those as they have some flavor as well as a different texture. I hear that kidneys have a sort of velvety texture to them, kinda like eating a mousse.
I never tasted these myself, but I have seen tons of cooking shows and know that some places do like to cook with those items.
Sorry for the little tangent, I'll try to stay on topic.
It seems to me that this era is in sort of a transition phase. Before they would say those terms and not really have anything against it. Slowly they changed to be more politically correct, but now it seems to be going back and forth. I would remember that people would say "African-Americans", but now they just say "blacks" and don't worry about being politically correct. The same for gay and the synonym for it. I can remember them calling them "Homosexuals", but now they just say "gays". Or "gays and lesbians". Also the whole "midget" and "little people" thing was there for a bit.
I use to work at McDonald's, and I am a straight white guy (or as it has been put, "easy mode"). But the few black guys I worked with I would call them &*!@#s, and they would say it back. They wouldn't think twice about it, we all got along.
There are several gay people that work there, and the one guy would say that and the other words for it around without any cause. There was this one that we all thought was gay be he swore that he wasn't. But one day he was doing something stupid and I let it slip "That's gay" and he started to get all defensive about it.
I guess what it comes down to is who hears it, and how they feel about it. The openly gay dude had no feelings about being called gay, or calling anyone else that. But the one everyone thought was, and I'm not sure if he is or not, got all defensive when I accidentally said it.
And I am a big guy. I have my fair share of fat jokes. At first I didn't like it, but I got over it. I didn't let it affect me, so I don't get offended.
Post by
asakawa
The trouble with "that's gay" is that it
isn't
a phrase used to describe two people of the same sex kissing (etc.). It's used to describe anything that the speaker doesn't like. Sometimes it's used to describe something the speaker sees as effeminate (as Jason Alexander recently apologised for in his depiction of cricket) but most often it's simply used as a negative.
So if you disapprovingly described something with "that's gay" I would react too (and I do moderate that use of the word in that context on the forum).
Of course, it's not just "that's so gay", the point is that one is saying that a group is so bad that one can describe anything negative as being associated with the group. One wouldn't describe something lame as "that's so Jewish" without being keenly aware of the implication..
I don't believe everyone who uses the phrase thinks of it in these terms but that's what you're effectively saying when you use it.(##RESPBREAK##)16##DELIM##asakawa##DELIM##
Post by
ElhonnaDS
@Nathanyl- As a comparison, I know you called your friends the N-word, but did you ever look at something someone did that was unpleasant or inappropriate, and say "That's a n-word thing to do?"
There's a difference in context.
Post by
Nathanyal
When I normally describe something I dislike, I don't call it gay or the n-word. If I don't like it I call it stupid, idiotic, crazy, etc,. The one slip I had was about the only time I have used that term. And because of it, I noticed how he reacted towards it. But I have heard others say it, like the other employee I mentioned, and not notice anyone react like the first guy has.
There is another phrase that I have used jokingly from a show called Boondocks. It goes along the lines of "N-word you gay". All of us that have seen the show say it jokingly toward each other, something to laugh at more than to insult one another. Of course it was never said loud enough for everyone to hear, just the person we're talking to and maybe one or two around us.
Post by
Laihendi
When I normally describe something I dislike, I don't call it gay or the n-word. If I don't like it I call it stupid, idiotic, crazy, etc,. The one slip I had was about the only time I have used that term. And because of it, I noticed how he reacted towards it. But I have heard others say it, like the other employee I mentioned, and not notice anyone react like the first guy has.
Does this mean that you won't derisively call something gay because it might hurt a gay person's feelings, but you have no problem with derisively calling something stupid or crazy, without regard for the feelings of people suffering from various mental disorders who might frequently have to deal with people insulting them by calling them stupid or crazy?
Post by
Nathanyal
If the person with a mental disorder comes up with an idea or does something I find to be crazy or stupid, then I will call it (by it I mean what they are doing, not who they are) crazy or stupid.
If a gay person comes up with an idea or does something I find to be crazy or stupid, I will call it (again, what they're doing, not who it is) crazy or stupid. Because that is how I see it, as being crazy or stupid.
I do not call it gay, because I either don't think of it as something that is or causes happiness or do I find homosexuality to be something that relates to stupid or crazy things.
Post by
Laihendi
So you only use words such as stupid and crazy when they literally apply to what you are describing, and you do not use them as general insults? This is just for clarification for Laihendi.
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