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Is Porn Cheating?
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Post by
ElhonnaDS
Is it? Would you consider it cheating for your spouse to watch porn? Is it healthy for the relationship? Do you consider it within the rights of your partner to tell you they don't want you to watch it anymore? Would you stop for the sake of the relationship?
This would probably work better as a poll, but alas I am not that entitled.
Post by
Interest
Is it? Would you consider it cheating for your spouse to watch porn? Is it healthy for the relationship? Do you consider it within the rights of your partner to tell you they don't want you to watch it anymore? Would you stop for the sake of the relationship?
This would probably work better as a poll, but alas I am not that entitled.
If you want I guess I *could* make a poll.
Also, my answer is: "It depends"
Post by
240140
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Post by
557473
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Post by
OverZealous
Well, imo, if you are in a relationship, why would you need porn, in first place? If you have a need to watch porn, there is something wrong with your relationship to begin with. Although, if you watch together to try something new, I see nothing wrong with it.
That is, of course, assuming you are in a sexual relationship. Not all people are.
I say it depends - talk to your boy/girl-friend; if they are OK with it, then fine. If not, then you should respect their wish(es).
Post by
xaratherus
Well, imo, if you are in a relationship, why would you need porn, in first place? If you have a need to watch porn, there is something wrong with your relationship to begin with. Although, if you watch together to try something new, I see nothing wrong with it.
Sexual drive can be different between two people who are otherwise romantically compatible. There may be times when one person in the relationship is in the mood, but the other just is not; does the person who's currently aroused just damp it down? What if it happens frequently? It doesn't mean that your relationship isn't working, it just means that one of you is "in the mood" more frequently than the other.
I don't see any problem with masturbation while in a relationship, and masturbating with visual aids - pornography - is just a normal extension of the act.
Now, if one person takes to masturbating and "porning out" almost exclusively, and ignores their partner,
then
there's a problem.
Post by
606231
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Post by
OverZealous
Depends how often you have sex too be honest, I mean if you're not satisfied and unless your partner has an extreme disliking to it then I don't see the problem.
And it is better than you cheating on your partner, which I can say about a few men I know.
Off-Topic
This would probably work better as a poll, but alas I am not that entitled.
I was thinking that there should be a 'Poll Request thread' where normal users could ask Premium for certain polls.
I second this.
Actually, I think I'll go as far as create one right now.
Post by
91278
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Post by
204878
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Post by
ElhonnaDS
I happen to agree with Xara (which I find I usually do as long as no guns are involved :P) Sex drive can different between 2 people, and as a female I spend 25% of every month on the bench anyway do to evolutionary development.
I personally have no problem with my boyfriend watching it, as long as it doesn't seem to lessen his interest in our extra-curricular activities. I really can't keep up with twice per day, and as long as he still vastly prefers the real thing to self-sevice, I'm ok with what he does to get by when I'm too tired or out of town on business or whatever. Occasionally, I'll even watch it with him. It isn't somehing that interferes with our relationship at all.
That being said, I am sure that there are a lot of people for whom it does interfere- they find the fantasy more attractive than the reality for whatever reason- be it they are no longer as attracted to their spouse or are fighting a lot and feel emotionally distant, or they have performance anxiety or intimacy issues that make it less stressful to use pornography as a form of escapism. In that case, I wouldn't necessarily classify it as cheating, but I would say that it's an indicator of a larger problem in your relationship and giving it up might be the first step towards facing that problem head on rather than avoiding it.
The reason this thread came up, is that I disagree greatly on this point with my sister. She considers porn in any form to be cheating, as if he actually slept with the woman. She tells every boyfriend at the beginning that they are no longer allowed to look at porn. They are also no longer allowed to watch regular movies with any female nudity, or subscribe to things like car and bike magazines where the girls pose in bikinis. She once left a theatre and screamed at her boyfriend in High School because we all went to see Starship Troopers together, and she was angry he didn't think to cover his eyes when the shower scene came on. She also once worked with a man that she had broken up with, and then came home fuming every day that he "dare" look at other women in front of her, knowing that it would upset her- mind you, he never talked to them in front of her because he didn't want her upset even though she had already dumped him, but she was furious he would even look.
Obviously, she has insecurity issues that go far past the norm and affect more than her view on porn, but I wondered what the general consensus was among people who weren't nuts.
EDIT: I agree with Doctor on the cheating thing- I don't think an attachment is necessary. Having a one night stand or getting a...um...another form of gratification that would Presidentially not be classified as sex...is a violation of trust and would be cheating.
Post by
91278
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Post by
ElhonnaDS
@ Sinespe
Thank you for the compliment, but since he's spent the last couple of weeks ring shopping, I'm probably staying put.
Post by
91278
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Post by
Azazel
New thread: "Is Sinespe's and Elhonna's online conversations cheating?"
Post by
91278
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Azazel
New thread: "Is Sinespe's and Elhonna's online conversations cheating?"
It is if Elhonna wants it to be.
Now you just need to cross your fingers that her boyfriend doesn't use wowhead.
Post by
ElhonnaDS
LOL
You guys are funny. I feel like "Thank you but I have a boyfriend" is the quintessential "Not going to cheat" line, so I think I'm safe on this one.
Post by
Jubilee
If you're sneaking porn behind your spouse's back and not being upfront with them, then you are doing something wrong, but I'm not sure cheating is the right word. If there is a mutual understanding or sharing in the issue, then of course there is nothing wrong with that. I don't want "porn" with my girlfriend, but we enjoy a good steamy scene or two :)
Post by
MrSCH
Sneaking =/= doing something wrong.
sometimes it just feels 'right' to sneak. I don't smoke in front of my mum. I wouldn't care if she caught me and at 21 it isn't against the law, but somehow it just feels
right
to not do it in front of her.
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