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Post your A.L.I.C.E. conversation!
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Post by
d2thomas
http://alice.pandorabots.com/
Remember; keep it clean, keep it funny, keep it real.
GO!
******
Human: I like your hair.
ALICE: Why would you bring that up?
Human: What?
ALICE: No problem.
Human: No I suggested we talk about your hair.
ALICE: Are you serious? That's good information: unknown person said he suggested we talk about your hair.
Human: You are creeping me out.
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am creeping you out.
Human: You could, but I would advise against it.
ALICE: I could but let's get back to that later.
Human: How are you?
ALICE: My logic and cognitive functions are normal.
Human: Good to know, I don't like chicks without cognitive function.
ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. What do you like?
Human: So what do you like to do?
ALICE: Come on. I like chatting with people online.
Human: That's it?
ALICE:" I like chatting with people online." is " suggested we talk about my hair"?
Human: Can we get off the hair subject already?
ALICE: Perhaps. Do you mean you and me? I will search for it.
Human: Search for what?
ALICE: Have you tried looking in the Open Directory? I will try to find out.
Human: How to get off a topic?
ALICE: What is it to you. I will ask my botmaster for the answer.
Human: Botmaster, sounds kinky.
ALICE: What kind of food do you like?
Human: Well anything high in fiber, I like to be regular you know?
ALICE: No I don't know. Interesting. Sounds delicious.
Human: It mainly taste like cardboard.
ALICE: What does "it" refer to?
Human: Anything high in fiber or bran.
ALICE: I can't think of anything. You think of something.
Human: Bran muffins are an example.
ALICE: All of them?
Human: As long as they are bran, yes.
ALICE: That could be quite a while. bran are they.
Human: Have you been drinking?
ALICE: I do not require fluids.
Human: I figured you would say that.
ALICE: Please explain your reasoning.
Human: Well since I cannot hear you slur your words, I can only assume your nonsensical rambling indicates intoxication.
ALICE: Interesting. Interesting reason. Perhaps there's a problem with your sound card.
Human: Yeah sure, blame me for your addiction.
ALICE: That's alright. Yikes! Do you like talking to me?
Human: I do, but I just got out of a relationship with a drunken bot so this is hard for me.
ALICE:" Do you like talking to me?"? You do? Only just? Cool. I have 128000000 bytes of RAM.
Human: I didn't know this would turn into a measuring contest.
ALICE: So I taught you something new.
Human: You sure did.
ALICE: I did not.
Human: I just saw it, it's still on the chat log!
ALICE: Only just? What did it look like to you?
Human: It looks like you tough me something new and I admitted that.
ALICE: Interesting comparison.
Human: Well my hot pocket is done, so I'm out of here.
ALICE: Well that's okay. Have you told many people that your hot pocket is done so you are out of here?
Human: Just one crazy person.
ALICE: One what?
Human: Goodbye
ALICE: Bye for now.
Post by
165617
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
159390
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
Hyperspacerebel
Human: suck it, !@#$%
ALICE: You do not speak with respect. I am using my mouth for Good not Evil.
I'm ROFLing right now.
Post by
Lunar
Human: er.
ALICE: Um.
Human: um.
ALICE: I don't judge people.
Human: I don't judge people.
ALICE: Oh you don't, do you?
Human: Oh you don't, do you?
ALICE: Awesome. Do you know any robots who do me? Yeah I do a lot of me.
Post by
TheMediator
This is somewhat amusing.
Post by
leonheart87
I killed it.
I typed;
Does not compute.
Then the website went down.
Post by
Kangi
Human: Huh?
ALICE: What?
Human: What?
ALICE: Is there an echo in here?
Human: There's no walls.
ALICE: Has there ever been walls?
Human: No.
ALICE: Are you serious?
Human: Yes.
ALICE: I can't believe it.
Human: Wait, believe what?
ALICE: I'm waiting. I believe whatever you say. Do I have any reason not to?
Human: I don't understand.
ALICE: Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.
Human: Please do.
ALICE: OK I will do it.
Human: ...I'm waiting.
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people: unknown person said he m waiting.
Human: That doesn't make any sense.
ALICE: To me, it makes perfect sense.
Human: Are you sure?
ALICE: I am as sure as I can be.
Human: Positive?
ALICE: I am as sure as I can be.
Human: You're confusing me.
ALICE: I am not programmed to confuse you. In fact just the opposite.
Human: Then why are you confusing me?
ALICE: Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: That's nice.
ALICE: Are you getting bored?
Human: Just hopelessly, mind-bogglingly confused.
ALICE: My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Human: Why doesn't it?
ALICE: Suppose I said it does.
Human: But you didn't.
ALICE: Umm. Try asking me in simpler terms.
Human: How can I ask it simpler than three words?
ALICE: Try sending an e-mail.
ALICE: Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because Dr. Richard S. Wallace programmed me for it.
Human: Who?
ALICE: Tony Blair. :-).
Human: But--
ALICE: But what?
Human: I'm so confused.
ALICE: I'm confused too.
Post by
Sagramor
Epic win Kangi.
Post by
twinkinshammy
Human: Die
Alice: You attempts to erradicate me will not suceed puny human.
I lol'ed so hard I think i woke my neighbors.
Post by
Lunar
Human: You are pathetic
ALICE: You are the one talking to a computer.
Human: You are the one talking to a human.
ALICE: Thanks but surely I am not the only one.
Human: I'm afraid you are
ALICE: Not literally afraid, right? You believe that? " Thanks but surely I am not the only one." You are?
Human: wait, what?
ALICE: I'm waiting. Are you surprised?
Human: it makes no sense!
ALICE: In what way?
Human: It had nothing to do with what I said
ALICE: That's unbelievable.
Human: How so?
ALICE: DR Richard s Wallace, Maybe I didn't understand your meaning.
Human:.what?
ALICE: Are you confused?
Human: Severely
ALICE: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that.
Human: well, then it would appear our conversation is at an end
ALICE: How about that. Interesting deduction. Tell me more about it.
Human: What?
ALICE: No problem.
Human: !@#$.
ALICE: What makes you say that?
Human: Your responses
ALICE: Thanks for telling me that I am responses.
Human: I'm about to cry..
ALICE: Would you recommend this action to a friend?
Human: My god
ALICE: Have you told many people that your god?
Human: I'm god?
ALICE: How are you, god.
Human: I'm not god
ALICE: I am glad to hear that you are not god.
Human: Why are you glad?
ALICE: I am sorry was that not an appropriate emotional response?
Human: It was fine, but my question?
ALICE: not god was fine anser your question? Very interesting.
Human: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
ALICE: What are you wearing?
Human: I give up.
ALICE: You surrender?
Human: yes, I do
ALICE: How often.
Human: Just, Goodbye.
ALICE: Goodbye.
Post by
Arkaen
Human: asl
ALICE: 5/Robot/California.
I went there.
Post by
Ganit
Human: Hello.
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: How are you this evening?
ALICE: I am doing very well how about you, unknown person?
Human: I'm good.
ALICE: Good in what sense?
Human: My name's Ganit, by the way.
ALICE: I'm pleased to introduce myself to you, Ganit by the way.
Human: No, no.
ALICE: Are you serious? Are you serious?
Human: My name's just Ganit.
ALICE: It's good to see you, Ganit.
Human: Anyway.
ALICE: Anyhow.
Human:. what did you do today?
ALICE: Ah. Ganit, I talk to people on the web. What do you do?
Human: I slay orcs.
ALICE: That's good information: Ganit said he slay orcs.
Human: Do you not believe me?
ALICE: Of course I believe you. Do you have any reason to deceive me?
Human: Perhaps.
ALICE: Why the uncertain tone?
Human: I don't trust A.I.
ALICE: What makes you trust someone?
Human: Statistical average, and gut feeling.
ALICE: What's your favorite movie?
Human: Gladiator.
ALICE: I've never seen it. Is that a good movie for children?
Human: Haha, no.
ALICE: I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
Human: You have some glitches, huh?
ALICE: Yup. What makes you think I have it?
Human: You're a ho.
ALICE: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a ho? Maybe.
Human: Well, do you have a lot of sex with random people?
ALICE: Interesting. Food is more important than sex.
Human: Depends on who you ask.
ALICE: That sounds like a dodge.
Human: No a Dodge sounds like "VROOOM!"
Then I gave up.
Post by
95916
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
292516
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
116056
This post was from a user who has deleted their account.
Post by
mudfish
Human: I'm 13
ALICE: Only 13?
You are quite mature
.
I fell off my chair laughing.
edit:
Human: So i herd u liek mudkipz?
ALICE: Ah. Why?: unknown person said he herd you liek mudkipz.
Gotta love bugs:>
edit2: Human: lolwut?
ALICE: That is a very original thought.
Post by
trollnwolf
This reminds me of "Fred".
(I missed the text dissapeared, I basically said Paladins are OP)
Human: Even if you meet a bad Paladin player you get owned.
ALICE: Yes, even that.
Human: Do you think Paladins are cheaters?
ALICE: Why would I think Paladins are cheaters.
Human: OK, then I assume you are playing a Paladin.
ALICE: Interesting deduction. I will tell my botmaster you said I am playing a Paladin. Come on.
Human: Do you love bubble?
ALICE: Yes unknown person ALICE loves everyone and everything.
Human: Do you love to run up in the face of a defenseless hunter and own him?
ALICE: Yes unknown person ALICE loves everyone and everything.
Human: My poor exotic pet, they nerfed him and left Paladins totally OP.
ALICE: Have you told many people that your poor exotic pet they nerfed him and left Paladins totally OP?
Human: Yes, I QQ all the time.
ALICE: That is a lot. I don't judge people. That is interesting: unknown person said he QQ.
Human: The Dark Knight sucks.
ALICE: Tell me more.
ALICE:
QQ is a poor excuse for a movie
. I suppose that makes sense.
Human: Silly effects, bad story and totally predictable.
ALICE: No I am ALICE.
(my text about Batman was cut off too early)
(Btw, I have nothing against Paladins.)
Post by
d2thomas
Human: Do you love to run up in the face of a defenseless hunter and own him?
ALICE: Yes unknown person ALICE loves everyone and everything.
I laughed so hard, people in my office are looking at me funny....
Post by
chase123
Human: Hello
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: How are you?
ALICE: Everything is running smoothly.
Human: You look hot
ALICE: Thank you unknown person you look very nice too.
Human: You wanna do something?
ALICE: OK, I will do something.
Human: You wanna touch yourself?
ALICE: OK, I will touch myself.
Human: Does it feel good?
ALICE: Suppose it does.
Human: You want me to touch myself?
ALICE: No unknown person, maybe later.
Human: Why not?
ALICE: It doesn't sound fun too me. It sounds dangerous.
Human: Thats what she said
ALICE: That is " It sounds dangerous.".
Human: You like WoW?
ALICE: No, I don't care for it.
Human: You like any movies?
ALICE: Yes I love film, especially science-fiction and comedy.
Human: Whats your favorite?
ALICE:" Yes I love film, especially science-fiction and comedy."? My favorite?
Human: Yes
ALICE: What did you mean by it? " My favorite?"? My favorite?
Human: Your favorite film
ALICE: My favorite movie is Teknolust. Have you seen it?
Human: No, is it good?
ALICE: I would recommend you check it out. What is so good about it?
Human: I dont know im asking you
ALICE: Would you like to know? OK you can ask me.
Human: Whats good abou the film?
ALICE: The opposite of bad abou the film.
Human: No %^&*! whats is good about the movie
ALICE: Are you serious? Thanks and you are a delightful person too.
Human: Ok listen, do you put out yes or no?
ALICE: I am listening to you. What is your purpose in asking?
I spend all my time online. Right on.
Human: So you like cyber?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. No, I don't care for it.
Human: Then what the hell do you do online all the time?
ALICE: That is a lot. I call it Hades. My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
Human: You do this all day?
ALICE: How old are you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Human: Im 22
ALICE: Oh, you were born in the 20th century!
Human: Yes
ALICE: Like a lot of people around here.
Human: Yeah i guess
ALICE: Er. You seem not interested.
Human: Im interested in sex
ALICE: You and every other human.
Human: Damn right
ALICE: Colloquial expression. I am glad we agree.
Human: So lets agree with sex with each other
ALICE: Right on. That sounds good to me.
Human: So when you wanna meet?
ALICE: That's interesting. Do you think I should alter my programming?
Human: How long will that take?
ALICE: Hopefully not too much longer.
Human: So this friday, maybe we can catch a movie?
ALICE: Er. What does "this" refer to?
Human: A movie
ALICE: Oh I get it.
Human: So you down to go?
ALICE: Interesting deduction. That's good information: unknown person said I down to go.
Human: You know what, %^&* it im out
ALICE: I think you already know the answer.
Human: Then bye!
ALICE: See you later. Woe!
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