This site makes extensive use of JavaScript.
Please enable JavaScript in your browser.
Live
PTR
10.2.7
PTR
10.2.6
Beta
Stormcross (Part 1)
Post Reply
Return to board index
Post by
Monday
(So I just finished reading the Nightside/Drood series by Simon R. Green and book 4 of the Dresden Files (Jim Butcher) and so I decided to try my hand at writing 1st person. This is part 1, prologue for Stormcross is in my topic list.)
I stared with a rapt horror as the waves of rotting dead rose from the ground of what was once the busy farming town of Andorhol. Behind me the rhythmic rat tat tat of machine gun fire sounded from the complex set of gears and tubes that was Fjarn’s Holy Machine Gun.
I felt my arms rise, as if by somebody else, and pull the trigger. A bullet hit a zombie in front of me, blowing its brains out. I mechanically placed my gun on my back and pulled out my axe, already stained with the blood of one of my team, who fell to the zombies and arose again.
I felt the anger, still undimmed, rise within me, and I raged into the group. One ghoul jumped at me, claws raised to strike. I lazily parried them on my haft, and brought a punch from below, knocking the ghoul backward. It stumbled, but didn’t feel the pain and came at me again, scooping up an old pitch fork.
The pitch fork stabbed forward. I slipped to the side and brought my axe down. The ghoul, with an agility that belied its rotting nature, turned faster than I thought possible and stabbed at me. It was a feint, as it brought the back around to hit me in the face. I dodged, but the handle continued around and hit me in the back of the head.
I controlled my pain and stabbed forward with my axe head, knocking a good size hole in its ribs. It stumbled backwards, and I brought my axe forward and decapitated it.
It had all seemed so simple. Protect some Argent Dawn Agents as they slipped into the city, so they could mark some targets for full on attack by an Argent Dawn army. We couldn’t take on a whole town, but we could hold it off long enough for them to get their job done.
Except that the first agent was killed the moment we arrived in the town. We kept a close eye out, but not below us. As we crossed the bridge, skeletal arms reached from below and grabbed the agent, pulling him under the bridge. Pieces of his body flew past us. We tossed some incendiaries down, but it was too late.
With a grimness we pushed forward into the city proper. The town itself seemed blighted. The walls of the buildings were stained red, and the ground was littered with bones. We had no issue pushing through the zombies, until now…
I shook myself out of my self imposed reverie and took to the zombies with a vengeance. Khaz was suddenly at my shoulder, automatic spraying fire at the zombies. “We’ve got to pull back!” he yelled. I shook my head and decapitated another ghoul. “We’ve got to hold them off for a few more minutes!” I yelled. Khaz grimaced, but nodded. “Fjarns almost out of ammo!” he called back, as we were separated for a moment by the tide of battle.
I just got back to Khaz, who chopped a skeleton off my shoulder. I clapped him on the back, when a voice shook the air.
“Feel the cold and despair…”
Araj the Summoner…
Post by
Monday
Nothing? Is it the writing style, the first person? Do I suck at it?
Post by
Morec0
Nothing? Is it the writing style, the first person? Do I suck at it?
Heh, just never noticed it.
All in all, looks good. First person isn't difficult to write, its just odd to read (sometimes). Despite this, though, I'm interested to see how the characters involved deal with Araj.
Post Reply
You are not logged in. Please
log in
to post a reply or
register
if you don't already have an account.